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Archive for the ‘Procrastination’ Category

Symptoms of Compassion Fatigue

Some of the tell tale signs of compassion fatigue are listed below.

Lack of enjoyment in day to day activities

Not deriving any joy from things that used to excite the person earlier

Difficulty in concentrating in any task

Feelings of anxiety and perpetual fear

Feelings of irritability triggered by trivial things

Isolation from family and friends

Detachment from work and life

Inability to take big or small decisions

Lack of interest in work

Avoidance of certain situations and people at work

Unprovoked outbursts of anger

Constant feeling of dread and imagination of doom

 

Causes of Compassion Fatigue

Some common causes of compassion fatigue are listed below.

Interacting with and taking care of terminally ill patients day in and day out

Caring for a physically or mentally challenged child

Counseling grief stricken families in times of grave environmental disasters

Counseling victims of sexual abuse

Working in a help line to support and encourage trauma victims

Working in close association with mentally challenged people

Providing support to people suffering from depression

via Compassion Fatigue Causes.

 

As an advocate the key to success is being able to balance compassion so that fatigue is avoided, or if it occurs that it is quickly diverted and conquered.  I am fortunate that I work at a place that takes “wellness” seriously and we are allowed to go into a wellness session for almost 2 hrs each month paid for and flexed time away from the phones, giving one an option and opportunity to balance a 40 hr work week on the phones with folks in various crisis situations  with some downtime to take care of you (the advocate).

Sometimes the wellness sessions would include meditation methods, a bit of art therapy, a bit of learning of various techniques that we can also share with the callers, some yoga, some zumba, pottery making, learning to laugh, and so much more.

More important is to take application of the things learned from the wellness sessions to make a better quality of your own life.    Healthy eats, exercise/movement, quiet time, time to voice and be an activist outside of the work environment, and so much more.

A great book that wasn’t mentioned in the connective article to read about compassion and taking care of yourself is a book called 

Trauma Stewardship: An Everyday Guide to Caring for Self While Caring for Others

 by Laura Van Dernoot Lipsky and Connie Burk, which can be found on Amazon.com.  It’s definitely a worthwhile book to read and may become your “Bible” beside you if you are a caregiver in any aspect.  Their website is something that is valuable for continued support in your own journey for continued caregiving of others — http://traumastewardship.com/.

What ideas do you have to focus upon to combat compassion fatigue in your everyday life and continue on the enjoyment of the journey of Caregiving in the sense that it is really meant to be?  Would love to hear more ideas from you.

 

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Making lists doesn’t always put our world in order, but it certainly helps us to feel more orderly.

~ Anonymous

lol..

I don’t know how many lists that I have written over the years, but it has certainly made me rest better at nights very often so that I could have a renewed perspective of the upcoming day, as well as a renewed charge and dedication to eliminate as many of the items off of my lists.

How about yourself????

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In reading some profiles on Fubar (much like MySpace), I ran across one that had this written on it (by “Lonewolf”)…..

The most wonderful of all things in life,
I believe, is the discovery of another human being
with whom one’s relationship has a glowing depth,
beauty, and joy as the years increase.
This inner progressiveness of love between two human beings is a most marvelous thing, it cannot be found by looking for it or by passionately wishing for it. It is a sort of Divine accident.
Don’t undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others.
It is because we are different that each of us is special. Don’t set your goals by what other people deem important. Only you know what is best for you.
Don’t take for granted the things closest to your heart. Cling to them as you would your life, for without them life is meaningless.
Don’t let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past or for the future.
By living your life one day at a time, you live all the days of your life.
Don’t give up when you still have something to give.
Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying. Don’t be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect.
It is this fragile thread that binds us to each other.
Don’t be afraid to encounter risks.
It is by taking chances that we learn how to be brave.
Don’t shut love out of your life by saying it’s impossible to find.
The quickest way to receive love is to give love.
The fastest way to lose love is to hold it too tightly;
and the best way to keep love is to give it wings.
Don’t dismiss your dreams.
To be without dreams is to be without hope;
to be without hope is to be without purpose.
Don’t run through life so fast that you forget not only where you’ve been, but also where you’re going.
Life is not a race, but a journey to be savored each step of the way.

I, especially, love the part about “…Don’t dismiss your dreams.  To be without dreams is to be without hope; to be without hope is to be without purpose. ….”  We all need a purpose in our lives – a purpose for the enjoyment of the moment, and for our future ahead of ourselves (whether or not we can determine what our future is exactly).

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(Actually written 1/2/08:)

I saw a bumper sticker the other day and was puzzled slightly by what it said — “Those who abandon their dreams, will discourage others.”  Although I wrote it on my hand, and later on in my datebook journal I received as a Christmas gift, it just didn’t make sense to me until today.  After all, eventhough I haven’t achieved all of my dreams, I am still the cheerleader encouraging and empowering others to be able to move forward with their own dreams.

Today, though, I indeed had a v-8 moment and realized just what the bumper sticker could possibly mean.

For my living, I am an advocate for those who may not necessarily speak up for themselves.  Currently, I have found myself being an advocate for the elderly as part of my vocation and passion and, as a rule, I truly enjoy what I do.  One client though I have been struggling with to keep upbeat about it.

When I first started going to this client a few weeks ago, I was shocked by the care of his room.  While he may have incontinence, his room reaked of urine all over newspapers, bed linens, clothes, and such.  Apparently, he can’t remember to wear his “briefs”, the depends.  That, in itself is one thing, and makes my job enduring as each week I have to spend 3 hours waiting for the loads to wash through and I don’t feel like I can do this client justice fully because I don’t feel like I have as much time to visit with him, but he tends to stick things in the toilet and stops it up as well (ie, apparently he doesn’t like carrots so they end up in the toilet, which is very disgusting.  I end up having to call maintenance of the facility to come fix the toilet.  It shouldn’t get to the point it does.  The client has a phone; he could call for maintenance himself.  He also walks to the dining room each day; he could tell the management office his needs as well, but he chooses not to.  So, each week I return and I encounter much of the same thing.  You would think that someone wouldn’t want to stay in a room that smells like urine, much less sleep in wet sheets and covers each night.  Each week I keep thinking to myself, “Why, then, do I put myself through such turmoil?”

The answer lays in the fact that I continue to hope that I can make a difference in this man’s life, although, it appears that his level of care needs to be much higher.  This man, who used to not even move out of the bed, does now greet me at his door each week so I am doing something right, it would appear.

Too, while waiting for the clothese to be washed and dried, I’ve met other residents that walk (or, ride) by and they either wave or stop to talk to me for a bit.  I think that they are just happy to see someone else available to hear what they have to say about their day.  Some of them are now even introducing themselves to me with their names and inviting me to go visit them in their rooms — so many are just anxious to have company and companionship.  Even in an assisted living facility, so many residents keep to themselves, which is a shame.

Earlier this morning, I checked my Fubar page just as anyone might check their MySpace page or emails, and saw one of my best friends indicate that he was having trouble waking up this morning.  I called him and told him that, while he was having trouble waking up, I was having a great deal of trouble just motivating myself to move forward to go see this client this morning.  We were talking about why I was having trouble in particular today and he set a positive tone for me by saying to me, “At least, you will have lots to blog about today,” and he was right.

Although I am discouraged by this man’s seemingly giving up on his dreams of having a great life in spite of his health problems, I am discouraged (just like the bumper sticker says).  However, what relights my enthusiasm for returning each week is the brightened eyees and smiles of others I see each week at this facility.  Today, I was surprised, too, in that this man didn’t stay in his room while I was tending to his laundry down the hall.  He actually got up and took the trash to the laundry room area and later he came down to the sitting area and talked with me for a bit telling me that the maintenance has come while I was down here.  Not only once though, but three times!  Maybe next week, he’ll actually sit down and talk to me?  At any rate, any progress made is certainly making way for encouragement that my advocacy is making a difference.

I’ll certainly have to remind myself that, as I crawl out of bed next Wednesday morning, while advocacy work can indeed be very discouraging, it is encouraging to see when folks be able to crawl out of their hinderances (sometime created by themselves) and start getting a little more excited about life.  That is the reward I get in lieu of great monetary salaries, a richness more fulfilling to living a life than making a huge income and not being able to stop and observe life for what it is.  Humanity is a precious regard on this earth; unfortunately, most people are too focused on making the big bucks that they often forget the joys that would surround them if they would just stop and look!

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In Slate.com there was a cartoon that indicated the lack of US cooperation with the Global Warming issue.  With Al Gore’s campaign for the “Inconvenient Truth” that he has been doing in the past few years, you would think that the prospect of US’s involvement with the global warming issues would be higher.  What this cartoon fails to portray is the thought of what cooperation is being had by the other countries in this world.  I wonder what that would actually look like????

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Although I have run across this blogger, known as “Midnight Dancer”, on another social site (currently called Fubar and fka Cherry Tap & fka Lost Cherry), his blog entitled “Let’s Dance Through Life: Love, Honestly, and the Internet” has a posting called “No Guts, No Glory” and poignantly states:

It has been said many ways: No guts, no glory. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.

Life is full of chances and opportunities. But to take a chance .. to reach for an opportunity … there is risk involved.

Some people like to play it safe. They don’t want to take a risk. They have been hurt before and are afraid of being hurt again.

That is totally understandable. I have taken many risks in my life, and I have been hurt. The question one has to ask themselves is, “is the risk worth the reward?”

I have always answered this question, “yes!” Because I know that the reward is the best thing I would ever dream of, and I have said that I will go through anything to get that. And if I quit, then all that I have gone through in the past would be for nothing.

But sometimes … I waver in this. My courage begins to falter. Sometimes I think, “Not again. I don’t want to do this anymore. It’s too much.”

Then I try to take a deep breath, and think, maybe the next risk will be the one that pays off. And I remind myself; I repeat it to myself like some kind of mantra. “No guts, no glory.”

I had responded by stating that…. “Hmmm… I am sure that my crisis callers may not all appreciate that motto or mantra; however, it is certainly one to keep in mind indeed for all of us who have ever taken risks — or about to! :D”

Don’t you think???

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Received Oprah’s “Today’s Mission Calendar Inspiration” email today wherein in the first paragraph it states about the January issue, “Let the hot air out of the self-esteem balloon–and find a more stable basis for carrying yourself through the world.”  What a great quote!

Wow!  Isn’t that a formidable quest at times???  A more stable basis for carrying oneself through the world???  After all, our world as we might know it gets shaken up all the time — divorce, marriage, becoming pregnant, realizing you can’t have children, in a domestic violence situation (whether it be physically or emotionally OR even if it doesn’t directly involve you but involves someone that you love or have as a friend), illnesses, deaths, etc.  We don’t plan on these events happening in our lives (directly or indirectly) but many are destined to be inevitable to happend, after all wherever there is life, there is also death around us.

For some, it can feel like a never ending cycle.  “Let me off of this roller coaster ride, please!” some will say; others, will not feel the affects of the roller coaster rides of life in general because they live ever so protected lives whereas many of us will feel small in comparison.  After all, how is it that they can have such even keel lives and others don’t?  I certainly don’t see “Hurt me!” written on the foreheads of victims nor do I see “Immortal!” written on the foreheads of those seemingly completely escaping the vast majority of the effects of the rash, bumby roller coaster ride.

How does one truly set out to find oneself more stable for carrying oneself through the world? 

* Having one job that can support yourself and your family?

* Advocating for the future of others?

* Having a job that allows you to afford to be able to spend more time with your family?

* Decluttering life’s “treasures” from one’s home?

* Having an income that will provide for a possibility that you actually have a savings for those emergencies and/or to set aside for retirement — so that one can truly enjoy retirement?

* Vowing to live healthier?

* Having opportunities for vacation time so that one can truly enjoy life?

* Restoring one’s faith in humanity?

* Having an opportunity to make time to enjoy doing things that one enjoys doing besides just working, sleeping, working, and sleeping?

What in the world is it going to take to make one more stable in order to carry themselves in the world?  What would it be for you?

For me, it would be to find that perfect balance in life where I can work to have the bills paid and a bit left over for savings, while having enough time to continue doing the things I enjoy doing — ie,  being with family and friends, blogging (go figure, huh?), artistic endeavors — as well as achieving the things that I want to do — ie, writing the book that is swarming in my head and waiting to be put into print, traveling to other countries that I haven’t been yet to (Belize, Equador, Scotland, Ireland, and Peru), building a modest home in the countryside, and finding a mate to share the rest of my life with one day (someone, that I can see us sitting in our rockers on our porch on our countryside home and just reminiscing about the good things in our lives when we become too old to move around like we had in the last 40-50 years of our lives).   Obviously, though, not all of those things can be accomplished in 2008 — or, can it?  We all must realize our limitations without letting our visions of our limitations stimy our growth. 

I am not sure that one can ever truly find that “perfect balance in life”, but surely one can attempt to try, can’t they?

Goals are nice, but getting them put into action seems daunting at times; sometimes, appropropriately determining one goal in particular is more important that setting many that will merely set us up for failure of being able to accomplish anything.  The purpose of having a New Year’s Resolution, after all, can be to light that fire of inspiration below ourselves to motivate ourselves to move forward from whatever level of instability that we have had in our lives in the past to empower us to move towards the level of stability that we all really truly desire.

Do you have a goal that you are going to put into action?  What might that be???

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I am often wondering what this truly is. What is normal, afterall? For a person that works the typical 8a-5p shifts, sleep hours might be 9p-6a…or something of that nature. However, for the person working the night shifts, it may invert drastically.

As for me, my hours shift according to the day… sometimes working day shifts; sometimes working night shifts. This can really wreak havoc on the system when one can’t supply a consistent schedule or order in ones day to day events. Yes, one can use a little shuffling for a change of pace; but, how long should this shuffling of pace be and remain a good factor in one’s life remains to be seen.

What do you do to normalize your life if you have a messed up schedule???

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that promise to instruct you how to make it rich selling real estate. Although I suspect that it won’t be all that it purports to be, I am hoping that I, at least, learn a few things from it.

Has anyone ever found these programs helpful to direct you to the appropriate sources???

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in my apartment. It has a lot of good possibilities; however, I have been busy trying to make ends meet and have some for savings, that it never seems to find the way to the feng shui. lol…

Any ideas???

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chickenstory.jpg

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chickenhold.jpg

Lol… anyone who remembers the old Memorex commercials may know what I am talking about here!! lol…

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[YouTube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IE16oMoVzCs]

One leg of his life journey — the whole story yet to be unfolded before our eyes.  Are you reaching for your dreams??? or, are you willing to procrastinate your entire life away???

Kat

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notice that their DO NOT CALL notice is about to expire and their numbers will be fair game once again to hound you during dinnertime about needless stuff once again!

Especially, if you are one of those that did the DO NOT CALL notices back in 2003, it is high time that you do it again — or, have you got a new phone number that you haven’t put in a notice on???  Better do it soon!!

It just takes a few moments to do…. DO NOT CALL registration site!! Don’t procrastinate!!

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When you are inspired by some great purpose, some extraordinary project, all your thoughts break their bounds… and you discover yourself to be a greater person by far than you ever dreamed yourself to be.

 

– Patanjali, physician and “founder” of yoga

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I love deadlines.
I especially like the whooshing sound they make
as they go flying by.

 

– Scott Adams, Dilbert

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If you drop gold and books, pick up the books first, then the gold.

 

– Jewish Saying

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“Wisdom consists not so much in knowing what to do in the ultimate as knowing what to do next.”

– Herbert Hoover

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OMG, I went to YouTube this morning and found this message of a voice mail left by a hospital about the care of someone’s father. The lack of compassion heard here is appalling and is worse than any bill collector that I have ever heard. Someone needs to teach this woman a bit about compassion. Whether or not the family of the father left at the hospital has truly procrastinated about the decision certainly doesn’t warrant such a vile and rude behavior of a hospital employee.

[YouTube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qZ0HOq0qNi4]

PS. The message on this YouTube presentation is:

This is what compassionate care has come to under the Texas Futile Care law. Call or email your Texas State Representatives and Senators NOW so that hospitals can never again threaten to send patients “on to glory” against their will. Tell your Texas State Representatives to support HB1094 and your Texas State Senators to support SB439 so this kind of abuse never happens again.”

Truth of the matter is that it certainly doesn’t have to be this way…

After all, we are not just talking about a car that is beyond repairs; we are talking about a human being that is part of other individual lives.

 

For more information, see

Texas Patients’ Rights

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Seeing a blurb in SparkPeople in posing the question, “Is Procrastination Curable?”, I decided that it just might be a great time to write about it (that ugly word we all hate to admit to – procrastination):

“Procrastination. Putting off until tomorrow what you could do today. Is there a more counterproductive habit around? It causes more stress and anxiety than the Grinch in December. Procrastination solves nothing and usually makes things worse. It piles up unfinished business that lurks in and preoccupies the dark corners of your brain. You hope the pile will disappear, but for some reason it doesn’t. The worst part is that once we put off things we’d rather not do, we start to delay the fun stuff as well. How many times have you said “no” to an opportunity because you had to take care of something you put off earlier? How many lost opportunities can you accept? Let’s make action a habit instead. Tomorrow, focus on your toughest hurdle first. Get just that one thing out of the way and enjoy the rest of the day. Be firm and don’t let yourself off the hook. After all, it’s not going away. Follow that one strategy and you’ll be surprised how the momentum carries through the rest of the day. Do it now!!”

 

Procrastination can often rear its ugly head up in my world…

* cleaning house and decluttering one’s own life (in and outside of the home)

* remembering to take care of own’s own health before the needs of others around us (taking care of others is important, but without our own health in good shape, we aren’t going to be any good to them)

* writing a blog posting on a difficult (often controversial) subject matter

* remembering to have some humor and laughter in one’s own life (after all, laughter and humor can oftentimes be the best medicine in this world)

* delaying responding to a job offer or date because one thinks too long about it

* remembering to love yourself as well as others around yourself

* delaying to buy something that you really need while it is on sale

* remembering to say prayers for others around you (so often we pray for our own needs naturally before praying for others) and maintain the spirituality in our lives

* writing or calling a friend even just to tell them that you are thinking about them rather than waiting until you have something truly earth shattering to say

* remembering to continue to build relationships around us (building relationships is a two way street; if you haven’t heard from someone lately, contact them today!)

* taking time for oneself to have a vacation from work thinking that the needs of the business may not survive if you are not there

* remembering to be one’s own best advocate

* being that part of the village that helps a child

* remembering that we don’t have to be paid for everything that we do; it is okay to volunteer your time to meeting the needs of others

* and, so very much more!!

We all do it — procrastinate on some degree or level.   Recently, I have been guilty of it as well and have begun to take action.  For example, oftentimes, I will just let some ailments cure themselves; however, I have advocated for myself and found a way to get the treatment that I needed most immediately in order to feel “whole” and “healthy” in spite of having no insurance to pay for the needed care.  It took some whining and stomping of feet in an sense to get what I needed done, but after a lot of pleading, it has been taken care of this weekend.  Although the aftermath is currently a bit painful, it is certainly a window of opportunity to feel healthy again.

I have also done something about the feeling my career may be going as far as it may go by, upon hearing of a grant education opportunity to take a new path, I immediately responded and presented my case and won an opportunity to take that path through some additional education.  I am excited about that opportunity and look forward to learning, once again, about a field of sciences — a path that I should have continued some 30 years ago, but got diverted all because of a physics course that I had been advised wrong about.  That is a long story and all a part of history.

My daughter is about to have a baby girl in a little over a month from now.  I am truly excited about the baby coming into the world and have been enthusiastic in helping them as much as I can.   Because of her anticipated arrival, I have been making an effort to declutter much of my home and life so that focus can be had to help them out whenever possible as well.

I have vowed to make 2007 a part of making it about me this year — no longer procrastinating fussing about getting help for my health ailments that prevent myself being “whole” on the inside; no longer procrastinating about doing  something that might help me get out of the rut that I feel myself in career wise; etc.  Although, I love what I am doing for a career right now, it is barely able to meet the obligations for my bills and nothing left over for me.  I have no money available to do as I would like to do — travel, make myself more healthy, visit friends and family that live far away, etc.

What say you?  It isn’t too late to make 2007 a part of making it all about you either.  It is never too late, it is just delayed greatly if you procrastinate too much.  What procrastinations are you going to put aside to move forward in your life???

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